I'M MAGGIE

MY PERSONAL STORY

 

I want to share with you my personal story.  I want to explain how Maggie’s Way came about and why, after all of my experiences in life, I can finally say that I am truly happy.   

 

My story begins the moment I completely broke down.  I had spent my life trying to juggle so many things and I was completely exhausted – I just couldn’t do it anymore.  After my collapse, I was admitted to different clinics and was diagnosed with everything from ADHD, manic depression, major depressive disorder and PTSD.  I followed the therapy programme and took all the medication I was asked to take but nothing seemed to help.

 

If you were to look at my life, I had everything I could wish for – a loving husband, wonderful children, two docs and no money worries – I had everything, so why did I feel so bad? I also felt guilty for feeling bad – how spoilt was I!  Why wasn’t I happy?  What was wrong with me?  

 

These were questions I couldn’t answer at the time.  All I could do was complain, and no-one seemed to understand me, and they found me annoying.  I shut everyone out of my life but deep in my heart, I was looking for someone to break through and help me.  I was so alone that I just didn’t want to live any more.  In the end, I concluded that I had just burned out.  

 

Reflecting on my life now, I can identify all of the experiences I had gone through which led to my burnout.  I had such low self-esteem which I traced way back to my childhood and being bullied by my brothers who called me ‘stupid’ every day and I began to believe them.  I didn’t do well at school and, as my friends went off to college, I was left at homebecause I was just not good enough.  I went to England for a while, but tragedy struck as I lost a friend there in an accident that I witnessed.  A high point in my life was when I became a model – this was something I could do, and I made a lot of money.  But I was very insecure in this tough world where I also had to face rejection.  Eventually, I left the modelling world and did some reception job – which I really enjoyed.  But my life continued to have troubles.  I married my first husband, sadly things didn’t go particularly well and our marriage ended in divorce.    

 

After a few years though, I met the love of my life!  I was so desperate to impress this beautiful, fun, and smart man that things went completely wrong.   I couldn’t believe that such a nice man had fallen for me!  We bought a house together and I was going to arrange the entire renovation - but that went completely wrong!

 

Soon I got pregnant with Flynn, a large and very hungry baby!  My husband went back to work and I was alone with my son.  As any new mother will know, it’s a really tiring job!  I became even more tired and very sad.  Looking back, I was suffering from postpartum depression.

 

Frederik proposed to me whilst we were on vacation – it was so perfect, but I did wonder if I could handle planning the wedding.  At the same time, my father had become very ill with cancer.  He passed away just a few months after my wedding.

 

That was the final straw and I collapsed.  I was institutionalised and my brain seemed to switch off and I couldn’t think any more.  I was a zombie and all I could do was stare into space.  At this point I truly felt that my life was over.

 

I knew I had to make a plan to really try to get better.  So I went to India, alone, to a clinic specialising in Ayurveda – a traditional India system of medicine which aims to preserve health and wellbeing by keeping the mind, boy and spirit in balance.  The first clinic I went to was awful, so after a few months, I moved to another clinic.  By then, I had been in India for about 5 weeks and had lost so much weight – I now weighed about 55kg!  During one particular treatment, I remember this overwhelming sense of panic and the need to get out of the clinic.  So, I moved to a hotel.  I began to eat and I began to get stronger. 

 

I remember one day so clearly - I was walking along the beach towards the sea, I felt the breeze on my face and could see beautiful flowers on the shoreline.  The medication was leaving my body and I was starting to feel again – this was my rebirth – my awakening to life.

 

From that moment, I have dedicated my life to finding happiness through self-healing – by reading, reflecting, eating well and moving my body – which led me to Maggie’s Way.  My four-step programme to self-healing.